I was watching this korean drama, cheese in a trap or something like that. One of the guys became a stalker. He wouldn’t take “no” as an answer. He tried to become popular, he tried to manipulate people, he tried to look good, and basically he put a lot of effort to win the girl that he likes. Instead he became hated, he became creepy and disgusting to everyone. This is the case where the guy does not know what he is doing. There are a lot guys in real life like him where they like a girl but the girl found them to be creepy. I can only feel compassion and not hate. Hopefully, one day these guys will learn how to talk to women properly and how to do the correct actions properly because everyone deserves to give love and receive love.
I made a lot of mistakes too in my 20s. All we can do is forgive ourselves and learn from it. Hakuna Matata. Do not worry about it. This is the 4th dating article that I have. Hopefully, you read the first three which are self love, safety, masculine and feminine energy. You should read the Path Of Love as well. I will hopefully be able to bring them all together. This is a collection of everything I learned from gurus, pua, and personal experience. Also, I have not been in a relationship in a while so this might be incomplete but hopefully, this will still help.
Masculine Energy And Feminine Energy
The easiest way to think about masculine and feminine energy is to think about what men and women do when they are having sex. You have the warrior and the goddess, do and be, action and being, giving love and opening up to love, direct and passive, giving love and receiving love. The polarity of both energies attract each other. Since most women are very comfortable in their feminine energy, they will be attracted to men who have lots of masculine energies. I wouldn’t even say comfortable, I would say happy. Women do not want to go to their masculine energy all the time. It is not where they are happy. They want to stay on their feminine energy. If a guy is not in his masculine side or not doing his masculine roles then women are forced to go to their masculine energy. They do not want to stay in the masculine, they feel more at home in their feminine energy. They can go to their masculine energy sometimes but they do not want to be there all the time.
So if you want the girl to be attracted to you, stay in the masculine side. You should not do feminine roles in courtship, you should do the masculine roles. Doing the feminine roles is unattractive because if you are doing the feminine roles, then you are not doing the masculine roles or you are doing both roles. If you are doing both roles, you are basically playing with yourself, she is going to look for someone she can play with.
The Disease That Is Plaguing Human Kind
Hypothetical Scenario – there is this beautiful girl in your social group. She is everything you ever wanted in a partner. You are very attracted to her. Unfortunately for you, there are lots of guys in the group that likes her too. Some are more handsome than you, some are richer than you, some have more social skills than you, some can play the piano, some are amazing in sports, and so on. The girl is not ready to date anyone. She will be ready in 1 year due to her circumstances. The question is, what do you need to improve on to attract this girl? Do you need to be rich? Do you need to be successful? Do you need to go to the gym and look amazing? Do you need a good looking sports car? Do you need a house? What do you think you can improve on in your life so that this girl will fall madly in love with you instead of the other guys in your social group?
If you answer with any of the things I said then you need to read everything again. You do not need anything. You do not need to change your life or acquire anything outside of you to get this girl. You have the same disease that most people have. You have the “I am not good enough” disease. You look at this girl and you told yourself that you are not good enough for her. She is way out of your league. There is no such thing. If you believe this, then you have spent way too much time trying to acquire money instead of trying to create a happier life for yourself everyday. We will discuss why there is no such thing later.
The answer is nothing. You do not need anything outside of yourself to give and receive love. If you need anything then it will be inside of you. You need to accept and allow that you are worthy of love for being you. This girl that you like, you liked her for being her. She did not need to do anything for you. You need to think the same way. If you believe that you are not good enough, she will agree with you. People will agree to who you believe to be. You will also agree to who you believe to be.
What Would James Bond Do?
You have this thought inside of you which is “I am not good enough”. One of the ways to get rid of this thought is to see what a guy that has the thought of “I am good enough” will do. You can fake it until you make it. A great example would be James Bond. You can pick any guy you want. He can be fictional or non-fictional. He can be imaginary or not. It does not matter but this man has a core belief of “I am good enough”.
Example: Guy A And Guy B
Another hypothetical scenario. There are 2 guys and the girl they love ended the relationship. Each guy loves their partner very much. Here is what they did.
Guy A knelt down on the girl. He started crying. He grab the girl’s leg and he wouldn’t let go. He started kissing her feet. He said, “I will worship the ground you walk on if you don’t leave me. I will worship you. I will sing your name.” He started licking her feet. He said, “please don’t leave me. I love you. I love you so much I wouldn’t know what to do with my life. I will commit suicide if you leave. I will kill myself if you leave me.”
Guy B took the girls hand. He said, “I love you. I think you know that. I want you to be happy. If what makes you happy is not with me then I will accept it because I want you to be happy. If there is a time where you do not find happiness out there then I want you to know that there is a guy here that loves you very much. I will take you back with open arms.”
Let’s say the girls have friends looking at the scenarios. The girls at guy A would most likely be turned off at the guy. He is emotionally weak, he is unstable, he has no self respect, and like a big baby. The girls would never go out with guy A. But if the girls see guy B, they may think “what are you thinking letting this guy go. He is kind of good looking. If you do not want him, can I date him?” Guy B scenario is very close to this post that I wrote. He is kind of romantic.
Common Successful Relationship Formation
Let us look at common successful relationship formation. Usually this is what happens when two people go into a relationship. We are going to try and analyze the basic level. This is like the bare bones. In computer terminology, this is the basic essentials or parts you need to create a computer. Once you have the basics down, you can add other things like bigger memory, more hard drive, better mouse, big monitor, great graphics card and so on. In dating, you can add romance, you can improvise, you can go big, and so on once you have the basics down.
Step 1: Girl Makes A Connection, Invitation, Opens Up To You
The first step is initiated by the girl. You need to understand why this is. Let’s say you work in a company. Your boss likes this very hot girl in there. The boss tried to attract the girl and make the girl his girlfriend, everyday. One day, the boss got sued for sexual harassment. It is because the girl did not like the boss hitting on her. She felt uncomfortable. She was having a hard time working. She thought that she may get fired. Too much stress for her. If you are not invited and you kept hitting on her, then there is a high chance she will be annoyed at you and find you creepy.
Feminine energy is to open up to receive love. If a girl likes a guy, she will open up to him. She will try to make a connection. A lot of women cannot hide this as well. When women are attracted to a guy, it shows on their body language, speech and movements. The first step is usually initiated by the girl. Just because they are attracted to you, does not mean they want to sleep with you. They may have another guy they like more and you are at the bottom. Just because women are attracted to you does not mean they will sleep with you or go on a date with you. They could also be trying to connect with another guy or you may have misinterpreted the signal. But do not be afraid of this, I just want to mention it. This thing does not matter if you follow the steps I will tell you to do.
On this step, if women want to date you, or go in a relationship with you or just sleep with you then they will try to make a connection. It is different for each girl but you will know. With facebook, and social media, then this is very easy for them to do.
Step 2: Guy Takes Action, Takes A Risk, Catalyst To Make Things Happen
YOU HAVE ONE JOB!!!! Your job is to ask her out on a date. This is the only thing you need to do. This is masculine energy which is to take action. Again, let me stress this out. You have one job which is to take a risk by asking her out on a date. Women will not ask you out. Most women will not. They can once you two are in a relationship but for the first date, it is your job to ask her out. A man takes risk, handles rejection and so on.
It is her job to open up to you and it is your job to ask her out on a date. With social media like facebook, texting and so on, this is very easy. You can simply text her. If you do it in real life, if you get rejected, you will have to show in your body language that rejection does not bother you. You have to look cool. If you type in google, “how to ask a girl out”, you will see this. I’ll do it for you. Here is wikihow. If you text her, then you don’t have to look cool if you get rejected. You can just say, “if you change your mind…”, or “think about it”, or “ok”.
Step 3: She Accepts Your Proposal
She says “YES”. I will discuss what happens if she says “NO” below. But this is the common relationship formation so for this, she says “YES!”
Step 4: First Date
So for the first date you two are like, “HELL YEAH!! I AM GOING OUT WITH THIS PERSON!!!” You two are both excited. You two both want to spend time with each other. This date is something you two both wanted and you two cannot wait for this to happen. I like to take a girl on a dinner date. I like to talk to her and get to know her. Do not take her to the movies, or any place where you two cannot talk.
You will kiss her on the lips at the end of this date. If you two liked each other so much, then you two will be in a relationship at this point. If she wants a relationship, then you two will have one.
Step 5: Second Date And So on
If you two had a great time on the first date, then you will go to a second date. After the second date, you will go on a third date. This step is very simple. Try to space out your dates. Do not do it every day or every other day.
Step 6: Relationship Formed
You have to be like Sherlock Holmes from the show Elementary. He does not care about labels. Labels are very feminine energy. Whether you have the label of “girlfriend and boyfriend”, “friends with benefits”, “casual dating”, “married”, “taken” or whatever, leave this to her. The reason for this is that if you have this belief of “not good enough”, you will try your hardest to trap her into a relationship. You will put labels on her just to put a ball and chain on her. If she feels trap in a relationship, she will leave. What you are interested in is not the label but what is inside of her. How interested she is to you? Is she very interested or not? Does she need space or not?
So if she does not want a relationship but wants to date you then go out with other girls while going out with her. If she wants to date around then date around also. If she wants to be in a relationship then be in relationship. Leave the Labels to her. This is very feminine. For men, this has no use whatsoever. Masculine energy is to give love and not make women feel trap. Inside men is the urge to sleep with a lot of beautiful women. For women, one guy to love them is enough. They want that prince charming that will give them a lot of love. It is their job to put a label on you so that you do not go around sleeping with other women who are attracted to you.
She likes you, she opens up to you. You ask her on a date. You go on a date and you both like each other. You two are in a relationship. You two fall in love and live happily ever after. It is easy. This is what happens most of the time.
When Things Go Wrong
What To Do If Step 3 Goes Wrong. If She Says “No”
I put a diagram so that it is easy to see and people will not screw it up. Let us discuss, what happens when things go wrong with each step. I will just go to number 3 and discuss the others next time. This is the part where you have to ask “what would James Bond do?” James Bond will never sacrifice his self respect for a girl. If you have this belief of “not good enough”, you will sacrifice your self-respect. Since you believe that you are not good enough, she is going to agree with you.
Acceptance – Accept The “No” Without Judgment
Acceptance belongs in the path of love. No judgment as well. You have to accept the “NO” and not place a judgment on it. Do not place a judgment on it like she didn’t go out with me because “I am fat”, “I am not rich”, “I am this, I am that” and so on. Do not place a judgment on her also and do not get mad at her. You need to be able to handle rejection well and not get mad at people rejecting you. In the path of love, it states that rejection is good for you and this will either make you stronger or put you in a better path. Even if she has a non-negotiable quality like I only date rich guys or I only date guys that are the same race as me. Do not place a judgment on yourself or on the “NO”. Remember that non-negotiable qualities are created because of fear, love can conquer fear.
You do not need to know why she rejected you. Even if she tells you something, that something may not be true after a month or so. Just accept that she does not want to date you right now and do not place a judgment on it. Acceptance is very high in the path of love also. Everyone wants to be accepted.
Ask what would James Bond do? The rejection will not bother him at all. At the end, he will end up sleeping with the girl anyway. Even if he does not, he will end up with another beautiful girl. This is what a person who thinks he is good enough will do. He will accept the answer but not place a judgment on it.
Freedom For Her
The next step after accepting the “NO” is to give her freedom. You need to give her freedom to choose you again or make a connection with you again. Freedom is high in the path of Love. Everyone wants to be free, no one wants to feel trapped especially women. Women were not seen as equals before. They had to fight for it. Now, they have freedom to choose their destiny or get the jobs that they want. When women feel trapped, they will separate themselves from you. Giving them freedom to choose you or someone is very high in terms of giving them love. Giving women love is your role since you are the Warrior or in terms of masculine energy you are the giver of love. This is Guy B. Guy B is romantic.
The belief of you are “not good enough” will come out here again. You will want to chase her, trap her in a label, and never let go because you have this fear that you are not good enough. Unfortunately, this is just an illusion. Even if you trap her in a label, she will still break up with you because she can only agree to what you believe in which is that you are not good enough to be loved.
This is something James Bond would do as well. You have to love women in such a way that they can feel free and you can feel free. If your whole mentality is to trap them in a relationship then they will run away from you. The more you force them to be with you, the more they will resist it. If you give them freedom to choose you then they will consider it.
Freedom For Yourself
Loving yourself is very attractive. It is the first thing that I wrote about. Loving yourself is also considered one of the fastest ways to enlightenment by a lot of gurus. One of the best ways to love yourself is to give yourself freedom. When you give her freedom, you have to give yourself freedom also or vice versa. You can either give yourself freedom first or give her freedom, it does not matter. You always go for the original successful model that I talked about in the beginning. Do not settle for anything less than something easy, fun and lots of love. If she is not willing to give you the first model, then give yourself freedom. Let’s say she wants to put you as a backup or wants to put you in the friendzone, then give yourself freedom. Love yourself enough to give yourself freedom.
You do not know when she will be back. Some girls come back after 4 years, some more, some come back after 1 year, some after 6 months, some after 3, some after 1 month, some come back after 1 week. The point is that you do not know when the girl is coming back. Each girl is different. All I know is that the girl will come back some day. If she does not then I am happy for her. This is the reason you need to give freedom for yourself because you gave freedom for her. You do not know when she will be back. The universe can give you a very beautiful girl that will give you the love that you want and you may be too hung up on the other girl to notice.
You do not need to know when she will be back. You need to trust the universe that she will be happy and you will be happy no matter what.
This is not needed but this is very attractive. Build a great relationship with yourself. When you are happy, then it is very attractive. This is a great way also to get to know yourself, what you want to spend your time on, and etc. Life purpose is something you choose. It can be to spend time with animals, create software, go hiking, climb mountains, be a teacher, run a business and so on.
This is the reason why there is no such thing as women out of your league. What if your life purpose is something like teaching elementary school children? You just want to spend your whole life taking care of children. Then there comes a rich girl from a rich family with a big business. You married this girl. Her family wants you to take a high position in the company. You are a manager but you hate the job. You gave up your life purpose for a girl and all you end up doing is spending your time on something you hate instead of something you love. This is the reason why there is no such thing as women out of your league. A girl can be rich, but if you know what you want to spend your life on, then it does not matter. Her money may end up making you hate your life. So you end up looking for someone you are more compatible with, someone where you can keep your purpose because that makes you happy while being in love with her. If you think there are women above you, or there are women out of your league then you need to find your life purpose or what makes you happy in this world.
Once you know or once you pick your life purpose, a lot of insecurities vanish. You no longer require validation from your friends, people you know, and so on. You no longer require to impress everyone. You no longer need to be good at everything. You no longer need to be good at all. All you need to do is just keep making progress with your life purpose and that will bring you a lot of happiness.
Let’s go back to the topic. When you get rejected, you tell her that if she change her mind then she should tell you so that you can ask her out again. Unfortunately, you do not know when she will change her mind. If you have this thought that you are not good enough, you will create fear in your mind. You will end up calling her, blowing up her phone, texting her, and so on until she responds to you. You will get a restraining order hahahaha. Seriously, some guys get a restraining order. A life purpose will help you battle fear. If you are too busy trying to create a great life for yourself then you will not create fear on your mind.
What would James Bond do? He will save the world then sleep with the girl. Saving the world is his purpose and he will do that first before getting the girl.
She Makes Another Connection
When the girl that you asked out makes another connection with you or opens up to you again, then you will realize that the path of love works. You will never ever go back to the old ways were you chase, you put all the effort, she does nothing and you still lose her. All you got was frustration, anger, and self loathing.
What you need to keep in mind in this step is that belief that you have which is “I am not good enough” will show itself again. It will show itself in all the steps here. It is your job to battle and conquer it. In this moment when she tries to connect with you, you may end up creating drama. You will be like you took me for granted, you played around, you didn’t pick me, and so on. You are trying to create drama because this is what you saw in the television when you were growing up. This is how this appears in reality, she is opening up to you, and you are giving her resentment instead. Why would you do that? She is trying to make a connection so that love can happen, you slammed it back on her face with resentment.
Do not judge her. Stay in the present moment. You want to judge her because you have this core belief that “you are not good enough”. You want to make her feel not good enough as well so you two will be the same.
What will James Bond do? James Bond will take her out on a date, have a good time with her, and then sleep her. Isn’t that so much better than creating drama? What are you doing? You have to analyze your thoughts. Try to walk the path of love as much as possible. The path of love, there is no fear and no judgment and the path of love gets to sleep with lots of beautiful women. The path of fear will take you on a lonely road.
Why This Works
This works because you never gave her any fear. You kept your insecurities low. You gave her a lot of love. All you had to do is ask her out. To give her more love is to give her acceptance and freedom. Both do not require any action. She was already attracted to you in the beginning, but at some point in time she got turned off, she said “no”. All you did was give her more love like understanding, acceptance and freedom. Those are very high vibrations. Everyone wants those. She has no reason to not get attracted to you again because you did not give her any.
When you gave her freedom, it says a lot about what kind of relationship you will have. Let’s say you want to get married and she wants a divorce, she knows that you will give it to her and you will still care about her. No mess. Let’s say she is not sure whether she wants to go out with you. She will still try it because she knows you will give her freedom if it does not work out. You will not give her drama. She has nothing to lose.
If you think getting that beautiful girl is very hard, then you are doing too much. All you need to do is ask her out. Your one and only job!
Why Chasing Does Not Work And Why It Works
First thing I want to say is that women can chase, men cannot. So you cannot.
If you search youtube and google, everyone will tell you that it does not work. PUA and players will tell you it does not work and their main job is to chase women. They have to do it in a low key way or they call it that you need to have “game”. There are commercials for it and lots of meme out there making fun of people that chase. There is a freaking name called the friendzone. This is how you know that this does not work. If you are chasing her, you are basically forcing the “NO” answer into a “YES” and this hardly ever happens. Forcing someone to change their answer is control. It is manipulation. The way you think is something like this, “I have to do this, I have to do that, then she will fall in love with me”. The way most people think is that they can create an action which will become a catalyst for the girl to fall in love with him. You have seen this in the movies and unfortunately, it does not work well because this is the path of fear. It looks like this.
Rejection < Fear Of Not Good Enough < Lack Of Confidence < Control Her Or Manipulate Her Into Loving You By Action Such As Chasing < It Didn’t Work < Suffering in the form of Frustration then Anger then Depression < then Acceptance that you are rejected
Why does it work sometimes? It worked for me too. It worked for me once in my 20s. I realized why, she settled. You are going to be Mr. Right Now instead of prince charming or Mr. Right. I have done it too. I settled too a couple of times. In order for this to work, the girl you like has to get rejected by the guy he likes, or she is in a rebound, or experiencing pain, or she is experiencing troubles in her life, or some type of circumstance where she feels unattractive or has low value. Once she recovers, she thinks she is high value again, she has lots of guys getting attracted to her, Mr. Right Now is gone. She will dump Mr. Right Now. She will dump you. You will get angry at her because you never learned how to love a girl where she feels free and you feel free. What you want is to trap her, put a label on her, and chain her till she can no longer moves or see any other guy.
What you want is the first model where both of you are on a date and you both feel “Oh yeah, I am dating this person!!!!” The only way to get that is to give her acceptance, and freedom to choose you again. If you chase, high chance it will never work. Even if it does, you will always be “meh” or “so so” and so on. If it works, you better get her pregnant so she will marry you because there is a high chance she will leave you. When Mr. Right comes, you are gone. Even if you get married, she is not going to give you the love that you want. You did all the effort to get her, she did not do anything. She will not do anything even if you get married with her. Her goal for marrying you is to be comfortable and not to fall in love.
Chasing – “Not Good Enough”
What does chasing mean for men? Chasing is the embodiment of insecurity for men. It is because masculine energy is direct while feminine energy is passive. So feminine energy can chase because it is low key. Women can do it well. When men chase, they have to give up their self respect in order to chase. They become a butler, they become a dog, they do everything to please the girl. They put her in a pedestal which basically means I am “not good enough”. You have this feeling that you are lacking or you do not deserve love so you try to compensate with action. This is the path of fear. The path of love says you deserve to be loved unconditionally. Chasing is also annoying. You are a bother. It is unwanted most of the time.
One thing that we, men, need to understand is that chasing is the path of fear. It is not the path of love. It requires that the man sacrifice his love for himself, sacrifice his self respect and so on. Women do not sleep with guys that they do not respect. Think about it in terms of the first model. When a guy chase, he is making the connection, he is asking her out, he is planning the dates, he is doing everything and the girl does not do anything. The guy is basically playing with himself. Women want to play too. They will find another guy to play with while you play with yourself. It is because they know that you are happy playing with yourself so this allows them to look for Mr. Right while putting you as a backup.
If you are on the friendzone and she hangs out with you a lot like movies, restaurants and so on, you can easily turn this into friends with benefits. You have to negotiate it well to get it. But I am not going to discuss that here.
You Don’t Need To Court Her Because
You do not need to court her because the courting never ends. Even if you are in a relationship with her, even if you are married, even if you are both 90 years old, you never stop giving her love. You never stop making her feel appreciated. You take her out to the movies, to the park, buy her flowers, take her on trips, give her a massage, cook her breakfast and so on. You never stop courting her. It never ends. Your role as a man is to give love. Your role never stops and it never ends.
Women Will Test You – Common Reasons For “No”
Women are passive, they are not direct. So if you stay direct, you stay sexy lol. It sounds funny but it is true. If I am direct, I am sexy. It is polarity. Anyway, women are passive because feminine energy is passive. They try to figure out how strong you are by testing you. They will push your buttons, they will make you jealous, and so on. They are very good at this. The best way to pass the tests is to become a mountain. No matter how much the wind howls, the mountain cannot bow to it. No matter what circumstance they throw at you, what kind of fear they show to you, do not play the game. Become a mountain. Recognize that they are just testing you. You pass if you do. Also the more she is interested in you, the easier the test will be.
One of the most common reasons for a “no” is that they want to test how you will react. If you start chasing them, they will freaking reject you or put you in the friendzone. Women are notorious for putting guys as backups or into the friendzone. Women now have careers, they have jobs, they have houses and cars they need to pay, they have lots of bills that they think about and they have no time to sort through all the weak men. If she is very beautiful, she got a million weak guys asking her out. She wants a confident man or a man that understands how to treat a woman. The best way to figure this out is to test you on how you will react when she says “no”.
There are a million common reasons for rejecting you that does not involve you. They can be very busy, they like another guy, they don’t feel good about themselves and so on. It does not really matter what the reason is. You just accept the “no” and not put a judgment on it. Give her freedom, give yourself freedom, and when she connects with you again then ask her out again.
Date Women Who Wants To Date You
There was this guy, he went on a date with this girl. Everything went wrong. He could not find parking so they had to park very far and it was raining. They got soaked. When they got to the restaurant, the restaurant got the reservation date wrong. They had to wait two hours before they were seated. They got seated, he realized there was a big hole on his shirt. It must have gotten ripped off while they were walking. The food was terrible, it was under cooked. They didn’t eat much. When it came time to pay, his credit card got declined for some unknown reason. The girl had to pay for the food. He promised he would pay next time. You know what happened at the end, she slept with him, they had a great time, and they now have a relationship.
This is because the girl did not care about the mishaps. She was really into the guy. She really liked the guy. She liked him a lot that the other things did not matter. So no matter what happens on the date, she will have fun because she is on a date with a guy she really likes. This is what you want, what all men want when dating someone. You want her to choose to date you because if she chose to go out with you then it will be difficult to make a mistake. The test that she will give you will be very easy. For example, she likes a guy to be a gentleman. If you did not open the door, she will tell you to open the door next time. When you open the door, you passed the test and she likes you a lot more.
If you look closely, the path that you will take is a circle. You never get rejected. You are always giving them a choice to come back to you. Giving women freedom empowers them and empowers you too. It is a win/win situation. When the girl choose to be with you then dating them is a lot of fun. If she did not choose to be with you, you chased her or she settled then you will have to put a lot of effort into the date and at the end, she may still not like you or not have fun. So make it easier for yourself and give them freedom to choose you.
I Gave Her Freedom, She Got A Boyfriend
This is the most common fear that men will have. It is because of that “not good enough” mentality. With this mentality, you came up with the idea that women that are in a relationship are trap there or they are there forever. So you try to trap women in a relationship with a label so that you can have certainty. This certainty is obviously an illusion. Women will always end up with the guy that will love them the most. I think I talked about this on the first article about self love. It does not matter if they have a boyfriend, married, dating multiple men, and so on. They will always be attracted to the guy that will love them the most. You just have to be that guy by walking the path of love. The Internet says that women will always end up with the strongest man. When they say strongest man, they mean mentally and emotionally. It is the same in a way because the strongest man will have enough mental and emotional strength to battle fear. I say that women will always end up with the guy that will love them the most. I don’t really want to discuss the differences but it is practically the same thing with a few differences.
The guy that she ends up with is her number one choice in this scenario. You are just a backup so even if you chase her, she will still have a relationship with that guy. She is emotionally invested in that guy already before you came along. Whenever this happens for me, they always come back lol but the time frame is different for every girl. It could be 1 year, 2 years, 5 years, 1 month, 1 week and so on. I always believe that the girl will be a lot happier with me, and I will love her a lot better than the other guy. So if she ends up with that guy forever then I am happy for her because she believes that this guy will love her more than me. I will go out with another girl.
If she makes a connection with me while she has a boyfriend, then I will ask her out. I will say something like, “I like you a lot, I want to date you, but I am drama free and I love my life. So if you two work out then I am happy for you, if you two break up then I would like to date you”. Something like that. Maybe with more finesse lol.
Common Belief Of Strong Men And Weak Men
There is this concept of strong men and weak men. The concept is that if you are strong mentally and emotionally, you will be able to conquer fear. You will stop yourself before you do something stupid. Before you ruin your chances with a girl, or before you do something stupid, you will recognize that it is fear. When you recognize that it is fear then you will not do it. The guy that can conquer his fears will be able to get the girl.
I just want to say that this thought or belief “not good enough” is the source of a lot of your fears. So the guy with the belief of “good enough” will not have fears. This will be intuitive for him. He will not be strong, he will not be weak, it will be just natural. If you walk the path of love all the time, you will not have fear. You will have peace. You are considered strong by many because you can handle the fears that goes into your mind. If you have peace, there are no fear. Fear does not exists when there is love.
Fear Is Unattractive
Fear is very unattractive. Everyone knows this. You are the warrior. Masculine energy is the warrior. You are meant to conquer fear. If fear conquers you, then you are no longer a warrior. The girl you like will not feel safe when she is with you. She will not feel safe of the future, she will not feel safe of the present and she will not feel safe of the past. She does not want that. If you keep giving her your fears or your insecurities, then she will reject you.
Like I said, what is love? Love is connection. Love connects everything and anything in the universe. If you want to be connected to this girl then give her love. If love is connection then what is fear? Fear is separation. Fear can separate you from everything and anything. So if you want this girl to reject you then keep giving her fears or your insecurities. Keep showing her your insecurities and she will reject you. It is because this is what fear does. If you want to keep or get the girl, you need to give her enough love to stay afloat. If you are doing okay in a relationship then you are giving her more love than fear. If you got rejected, you gave her more fear than love or someone is able to give her more love than you.
When it comes to women, if you are ever confused which path to take, just ask yourself, “What would James Bond do?” You will get the answer.
Meditation To Get Rid Of “Not Good Enough”
A lot of your fears come from this belief that you are not good enough. You got this belief when you were young or just a kid. Maybe you got abandoned, your parents got divorced, you were not given enough love, or maybe even that you got scolded for something you did not deserve. Whatever it is, this belief of “not good enough” latched on to you. This most likely served you well as a defense mechanism when you were a child. But you are now a man. This belief no longer benefits you and it is ruining your life. We need to get rid of this belief because this belief created other beliefs like you are not worthy of love, you are lacking, lack of self worth, lack of self esteem and so on. This belief is a disease. Everyone has it. The sooner you get rid of it, the better your life will be. Unfortunately, this will be another article. It will be too long for this one.
YOU ARE INFINITE, ETERNAL, AND LOVED!!!
I have seen this video floating around in my facebook. A lot of people shared it. I have way too many accounts lol. Anyway, this stray dog was dying. They tried to save him. But he was too far gone and his body deteriorated to the extent that they could not save him anymore. They tried to give the dog as much love as they can before he passed away. This is the beauty of humanity. How much good can you do in your lifetime? How much laughter can you give to people? How much compassion? How much love can you give? The answer is infinite. You are capable of so much good, you can bring so much happiness to everyone around you, you can help so much animals, bring peace to a lot of people, help conserve the earth and this world will not be the same because you walked on it. This is how you need to look at yourself. You are not the clothes that you wear, not the car that you drive, not the job that you have, not the opinions of others about you, and so on. You are so much more.
Inside you is NOT a nuclear reactor that powers and creates waste. Your engine is like the freaking sun. No waste products, brightens the world, and so on. The amount of good you can do is infinite, the amount of happiness you can give to others is infinite, the amount of hope you can give to others is infinite, the amount of love you can give to this world is infinite, always remember you are infinite, eternal and loved. You are worth more than a Ferrari, a mansion, and any material thing. You are the priceless machine that was put on this Earth. If you can imagine how much good you can do to this world which is infinite, then can you imagine how much love you can give to a girl? How much love can you give to a girl? How many morning kisses, laughter, hugs, play time, dates and so on can you give to a girl? It is infinite. You can give the girl you love infinite amounts of love. The possibilities are endless. You are freaking priceless. In a world where everything revolves around giving and receiving love, and you have infinite amounts of love to give, you are so priceless that you cannot even see it.
This belief that you are not good enough was and is never true. You deserve to have unconditional love just for being you. You give women unconditional love, you deserve it back but you have to allow and accept it in your life.