Imagine Loving Life

Imagine Loving Life

imagine loving life 406 fall foliage

I leaped from one stable rock to another, trying to avoid as much of the bushes, branches and thorns tugging at my pants. A spider web brushed off of my face, my heavy backpack got stuck in a low hanging branch, and I almost slipped at a moss covered stone; these are the prices I pay for going off trail because my mind wanders to far off places. I saw a light at the end of a tunnel of branches, twigs and leaves. I raised my left hand and pushed off all the obstacles in my path. A sharp pain emerged from my hand as the thorns hidden along the branches grazed my skin but in a single second, I made it to the clearing.

The soft light of the sun caressed my skin, my eyes sparkled in delight at what I saw, as I find myself speechless, unable to move for a second. I dropped my backpack as I felt my body slowly being pulled to the edge, I could not stop myself as my feet seemed to have a mind of their own. I sat on the ledge, unable to think, unable to grasp the beauty that was in front me, all I could do is admire, and be fascinated at how beautiful nature can be. I felt joy in my heart just by seeing the lush colorful trees that were in front of me.

But hidden within this moment were the same feelings and words I should have told you, “I was happy just by seeing you.” I was happy seeing you smile, and being the source of that smile. I was happy just by looking deep into your eyes. I was happy when I held your hand, kissed your lips, and for those countless of times you told me that you love me. I was happy when you brought me food because I was hungry, and when you tried to cheer me up because I was sad. I was happy just by spending time with you. I should have told you all of those things and more, then maybe we would still be together. But you are now with someone who loves you more than I ever did, appreciates you more than I ever did, and makes you happier than I ever did.

Hidden within this moment were feelings and words that are true, “I am happy.” I am happy for you that there is someone that loves you with all of his heart. So my heart is at peace knowing someone is beside you doing his best to see you smile. I am happy that he loves you the way I should have loved you. I know in my heart we will never again feel what we have felt before. But I know one day, I will love another, I will love her far more than I should have loved you,¬†and in that same day, I know you will be happy for me, the same way I am happy for you.

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