I already explained why this is called “Being A Man” in here. I can only help guys develop their masculine energy. There is most likely a way to develop your feminine energy to attract the girl but I do not know. I do not believe anyone knows. The ‘Goddess’ path is a mystery. I’ll cover this very quickly to get rid of the feminist mindset of a lot of guys have because you will see that women are very powerful in this article. Masculine energy is the Warrior, and feminine energy is the Goddess. Masculine energy will be a hammer. It can destroy, and it can create. It can protect and it can kill. Its purpose is very direct and can be seen. The Goddess is art. It is like a painting or flag or banner. Just by its presence, it can give courage, willpower, strength and lots of emotions. While the hammer can take lots of punishment, the painting cannot. The painting needs to be handled carefully. Both have their own strengths and weaknesses. Ever been with a girl and you just feel that you should work harder with your job, in school, or become a better person? Why do you feel this way? Goddess is a mystery.
The number 2 rule is that “The guy who keeps her safe and makes her feel safe will have her heart”. So if you want a girl to fall in love with you, then keep her safe or make her feel safe. This has a lot of masculine energy and it is one of your highest forms of expression of your love. I will provide lots of examples of decision making in the next article. There are so many that I cannot cover them all so we will just go with this statement or guide. “Act in such a way that will bring honor, and respect to yourself so that you can give honor and respect to others”. This is so simple and sounds so cool. You will know it if you are not acting and respecting yourself. A lot of decisions in life, you will be faced whether you will choose to “honor and respect yourself” or not. Guess what? The hardest decision is to honor and respect yourself. Masculine energy requires you to abide by this rule in order to become the protector. The Goddess does not have to follow this rule, Goddess can do anything. Goddess is a mystery.
The desire to make the girl you like feel safe covers physically, mentally, emotionally and spiritually.
1. Making the girl physically feel safe means you will protect her physically. It does not mean you will punch every guy that catcalls her, or every drunk guy that tries to get her number. It means you will be her shield if she is in danger. It means you will not put her in a position that compromises her safety. Putting yourself between her and another guy is usually good enough. Making sure she gets inside her house before you drive away, or getting out of the car and walking with her to her house. She just needs to know or feel, you will not abandon her and that you have her back. You will be her shield. You will avoid fights as much as possible but you will engage anyone if it means protecting your girl. Just read the last sentence and you will see that it sounds so cool.
2. You will protect her from the weather, environment and elements. This means that you are going to hold the umbrella for her, you are going to plan for her safety and comfort, you are going to offer your coat when it is cold. It means that you are willing to sacrifice your personal comfort to make her feel more comfortable. If your family needs more money, then get a job on the side. Remember, you are the warrior. The warrior is stronger and more durable than the Goddess.
3. Making the girl feels safe emotionally is easy as well. One of the best things you can give your girlfriend is to give her a safe place where she can be safe of feel at home emotionally. A place where she does not need to pretend to be someone else, something else and where she is allowed to make mistakes. A place where she can talk to you about her feelings, her emotions, what is going on with her, with her life, what are her troubles, what are her worries, what are her fears, a place where she can do all of these and not be judged or have negative repercussions. If you be that man for her then she will feel safe emotionally.
4. You will protect her feelings. This means that you will not play games, you will not play with her heart, you will be true to your commitments. You will not flirt with her emotions. You will not make promises with your words and actions that you will not keep. You are a man, you are more direct and active. You are never passive aggressive. Leave all the games, leave all the passive qualities, leave all the mind games, and cunning to women. Leave all those things to women. You are a guy. The one that “make things happen”. Your job is to ask her out on a date to be her lover. You do not ask her out on a date to be her friend, or guy that is a substitute for her girl friend. This means you are never afraid of rejection because you are always the one to take risks. Part of taking risks is handling rejection.
5. Making her reputation feel safe with you. As a man, you need to understand that women face a lot of judgment from society. A lot of judgment is a lose:lose situation for them. This means that if she goes out with you, sleeps with you or does anything with you, then you will not brag about it. You will not tell anyone. A man keeps his mouth shut. Look at my examples, I never talk about people I know or currently hang out with. If I ever give an example about relationships, it will be from 10+ years ago when it does not matter anymore. Even then I will change a lot of the details and just keep the message or point the same.
6. This also means you will not do a one night stand with her or take advantage of her vulnerability. If she wants a one night stand then great but you are not going to trick her. If she wants to have a relationship, and you just want a one night, then you have to be clear. Some women, they will do it and some will not. Accept that.
7. The best thing to make her feel safe is to make her feel that she is never alone. When problems arises, you are there for her. When things do not go unexpectedly, you are there for her. When she has a lot of responsibilities, you will take half of it. When she needs encouragement, you will provide it. So on and so forth.
Ok, I think this is good enough. Most guys will not remember this. I do not even remember it hahaha. I am just kidding, I actually do. I will give examples of decision making in the next article. I’ll give an example here as well. I’ll give you an image so that you will understand or remember how to make the girl fall in love with you. A great example of how you should act to make the girl feels safe is when a father teaches her daughter how to ride a bike. Here is a random clip. You have a lot of things here. She feels safe because her father is holding on to the bike, he is giving her words of encouragement, she knows that his father will not let any harm go to her. The father, he is protecting her from being kidnapped, getting hit by cars, and falling down. He is not forcing her to do something she does not want to do. She can feel that his father loves her and concerned for her. This gives her a lot of confidence. Every time you do not know what to do or how to act in front of a girl you like, just think of this image and you will know.
Let us look at a case. I’m going change some of the details but the message is the same. A lot of guys do this mistake so you can see what you are doing wrong.
There was this marine. He will be in the USA for a month or two. He was dating this girl in an off and on relationship. The girl was very hesitant. She dumped him for another guy but that guy is no longer in her life. She does not mind dating this guy again. The marine gave her big presents. On Valentines day, he gave her a $1000 jewelry. But he does not seem to get the girl more interested in him. He took her out to big dates. He would spend $500 to $1000 on a date. It would be a big date from 5 PM to 12 AM all the time. Still, nothing. She does not feel much for him. She became more distant. A lot of her friends are telling him that what he is doing is too much. The guy would not listen. He kept saying, this is what he wants to do and he is happy that he gets to treat this girl. He felt the girl being more attracted to other guys. They were not in a serious relationship so she could see other men. So what he did was that he picked her up from work to home always, he became her driver, he showered her with gifts and etc. Nothing he did worked so he asked this guy for help on what he should do. So the advice that my guru gave to him was that he needs to stop. You are a marine. You jump off planes, swim through oceans, you kill people to keep us safe and etc. You have the most courageous profession and most noble of goals. You should act like it. Do not let this girl walk all over you. Stop doing whatever it is you are doing. He even described to him what a simple date should look like and what he should do when they are not together. The marine would not listen. Fear has him already. He feared that if he does something different, he will lose the girl to another guy. At the end, the girl told him that they should not see each other anymore and that she is falling for another guy.
The marine asked why does he have to play games? Why cannot he just do what he wants to do? The reply was that he is teaching the marine to act normal. To act himself or to not play games. The marine did not realize that he is not acting normal. He is trying to impress her. He lets her walk all over him which is not normal. He changes his opinion to match hers. He does everything to not make her mad even if it means lying to her. He says sorry or apologizes when she is mad even if he did not do anything wrong. The guy giving advice was right because it takes a lot of mental and emotional strength to act normal. When I am with a pretty girl, there is so much sexual tension sometimes that I could not talk to her. Normal would be me joking around or talking to her. It takes a lot of strength to be normal because fear will be there preventing you from acting normal.
Ok, I just summarized the story. He was doing too much. He lost the Warrior or Protector image because feared controlled him. He became a worshiper. He worshiped the girl. No girl wants to be worshiped. Girls want to play and have fun with the guy. If you worshiped a girl, that means she is no longer playing. It means the guy is doing all the work and she is not doing anything. She does not have to do anything because she is being worshiped. If you let a girl walk all over you, she will be uncertain whether you will protect her. In her mind, you will just be a door mat or a person everyone will step on. If she sleeps with you, a part of her thinks you may brag to your friends about it because if you are bragging and trying to impress her, and you will do the same thing when you two broke up.
Anytime you throw away your self respect, anytime you act in a way that does not show respect to yourself, she will lose trust that you will protect her. Unless she actually comes into a dangerous situation or a situation that causes harm where the guy gets tested but that does not happen often so the girl, all she can do is trust her instincts that the guy cannot protect her.
This is how I know the Goddess exists in women. Guys will do the stupidest things to get affection from women. It is like begging for affection. This marine, he tried to impress her or buy her love. It is not as bad as the other cases. Other men would pay for the girl’s rent without anything in return, some guy would buy her a car, some guy would buy women a house, some will give her a promotion or raise, some will do anything. There was this guy, he bought the girl and her lover tickets for a trip in Bermuda or some island. He did not get anything in return. His reasoning as well is that he gets pleasure for doing it.
This is how I know how stupid this is.
The guy that bought this girl tickets, he fell for a friend of hers after a year. So the original girl told her friend that the guy bought her tickets to Bermuda. The guy flipped out and got so mad at the original girl. He cursed her out and everything. These guys do not mind that the girl walks all over them but if they like another girl, they do not want that girl to know he let other girls walk all over him. Deep down inside, guys know that they should not be sacrificing their self respect so that they can beg for affection or sex or love. A lot of guys get mad because there is some sort of entitlement to them. They feel that they should get something for being nice and doing stuff for the girl. Here are some pics to make this more funny and light hearted but they do convey the point.
What guys need to understand
What guys need to understand is that ‘LOVE’ is not something outside of you. It is inside of you already. It all starts with respecting yourself and loving yourself. I intentionally put myself into the friendzone because I do not want a relationship and I have a lot of work. I usually get out of it and I do not even intend to do so. It is most likely because I usually act like a man and I do not mind being attracted to women or flirting with them. I embrace my instincts. If a girl is beautiful, I compliment her and tell her she is beautiful as a friend. Also, it is most likely because I do not become a pleaser, butler or anything. So practice loving yourself, and respecting yourself. Act in such a way that will give honor and respect to yourself so that you can give honor and respect to others. It sounds so cool already. It is like a samurai path or knight that practices chivalry. It is very warrior like. Become the best partner she can have and she will be with you, it is not that hard.
One more thing. If you love her enough that you are willing to be her shield to protect her from danger which mean you may get seriously injured and you are willing to do all the things at the top then why do you need to impress her, or why do you need to act different or why do you need to prove yourself? The answer is that you do not need to, you are already willing to be her knight in shining armor and that is plenty. This is good enough to get her to be attracted to you and beat a lot of others guys that are attracted to her.
I leave you all now with much love in my heart. I love you all and hope you all practice the same love to yourself and to others.